My Quest To Winning

I am a looser. Two drops of tears roll down my cheeks as I take stock of the situation. It’s no use crying now. I have lost. My dreams have crashed. Everything is over. Was all my hard work not worth any recognition? But alas! Nothing can be changed now. Someone out there has been selected; someone out there has an edge.

 I am a looser. Or Am I?

I had given my best. I had given it my heart, given it my true self.

Excitedly I used to get up early every day and sit down with my pen and papers. The clarity in the morning hours opened me up and its silence would encourage my thoughts. The hanging chill in the air seemed to laud. I would spend hours immersed with my diary. I was in love. I loved the sense of tender touch when my pen would start to move, I loved the sense of movement when I began to write. I loved my inner voice, it would tell a writer, a raw writer like me: You know something; you are not bad at all!

Isn't winning working hard, trying your best
and believing that you can do it?

Inspired, I would soon find myself in a world of my own, soaked in my own sweet self, gaining momentum with every inch covered in my flight of fantasy. I didn't bother of any rules, nor of anybody existing, non existing, in this world. For me, what mattered was me, my thoughts and my inspiration. This was my world. Here, there were no restrictions, no barriers, and no bondages holding me back. I was free, I was happy and so was every written word of mine. Delighted I would stop to inspect it every now and then: My piece was gaining meat.

Isn't winning giving birth to something -- anything
unique and original?

Yes. Today, I feel low. The same things seem to be mocking.  There is chaos all around. The same breeze which once comforted me seems to rapidly slap my face. I shout and cry. I am ashamed. My tears are the proof of my failure. My world is in turmoil, it has turned upside down. I love it no more. It is not even bright anymore. The day is over. Pitch darkness looms large. Outside as well as within.

Isn't winning feeling that prick when
you lose out on something that you worked really hard for?
Isn't failure an important step towards winning?

Suddenly, I see a golden hue. A faint ray of light trickles in through the creak of my window and dips me aglow. I can hear people congratulating me. The claps are getting louder. I am smiling, there is a twinkle in my eyes, my heart is brimming with joy.

Suddenly the hue is gone and I am back to my senses. A gust of breeze sweeps in tossing a few pages of my diary in a ruffle. The pen rolls to and fro. There is stillness around. A new dawn is here. I feel the urge to start writing again.

Isn't winning dusting off disappointments
and forging ahead in hope?

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A few months later:

Two drops of tears roll down my cheeks as I take stock of the situation. My dreams have soared like a kite flying high. Everything is a new. Everything has changed. I am more confident. I am filled with pride. I am making my own destiny. I am making history. I am drenched in an ecstatic overwhelming feeling, one that can never be described only felt. I am personally satisfied. I am a winner. I am happy.

India Today Conclave - What does winning mean to you?
Winning is scripting your success story -- your style!

Hesitant and nervous, I start giving my winning speech.

"What can I say? Just like me, in this conclave today, there are innumerable winners, perhaps far more talented and better than me. This win is not mine alone. I salute all those who are dedicated, inspired and motivated to put their best foot forward in order to achieve personal satisfaction and happiness in all that they are doing. I salute all of you. You all are inspirational. You all are winners for me. And I bow my head in great humility before all of you."

Bowing thus, silently, I thank my Master, thank my blessings, and thank my inner voice as I feel grateful to my winning quest; it has today changed my perception of winning (and loosing!). Winning is not about acing medals or counting trophies but a lot more... It is about happiness you sense at an individual level, it is a feeling more personal. I make a little note in my diary. I have found my answer.

I was never a looser; a winner all along.


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PS: This post is my entry to a contest being held by IndiBlogger in association with India Today conclave 2014 under the topic - "What does winning mean to you?" Please wish me luck. :-)

Post a Comment

35 Comments

  1. Very well said..These thoughts keeps going in n out .. But to become a winner its essential to feel a winner first.. Uve penned the thoughts so well im sure many would connect

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  2. For a second I was wondering initially what happened to the every positive Arti ? Well written post, and all the best for the contest....

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  3. Arti you are a winner from the word 'go'! Best wishes for the contest:)

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  4. I started reading this post concerning about what was happening to you and finished with admiration and applause. I can't help thinking of many atheletes except very few, whose chagrin that have to be endured despite the utmost efforts they have put in. However, as you wrote I imagine they came to realize what winning meant to them. Thank you for this wonderful and insightful post. I'm sure you will be a "winner"!

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  5. A winner in all ways, good luck with your entry.

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  6. Arti, Connecting with others allows us to be more inspired!! Great article. I wish you good luck and take great inspiration in your journey...:)
    All the best for the contest!

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  7. I do wish you luck Arti! I love your writing.

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  8. wish you luck Arti, I love your thoughts, and actually, I am so deeply touched, makes my eyes misty a bit and my heart inspired. I salute you, for always bringing your best, and wishing you the very best.

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  9. Beautifully written! I loved the way u showed the transformation from sadness to hope and winning. All the best for the contest!

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  10. Καλή τύχη Arti μου, να έχεις την ευχή μου!!!!
    Γράφεις τόσο όμορφα!!!
    Σου στέλνω μια ζεστή φιλική αγκαλιά και πολλά φιλιά!

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  11. You're only a loser if you don't try and do your best. Nicely written.

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  12. Hey Arti, you're a winner - and you've got all it takes! keeping my fingers crossed for you!

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  13. You've always seemed like a winner to me, Arti! Your outlook on life is too positive to even think of yourself as a loser. Best wishes to you as you continue to flourish.

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  14. Good luck.I like your sentence. :D

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  15. I like the way of your writing and the earnest attitude of life. You surely advance if you are sunken. So please try. Best wishes for the contest!

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  16. All the best for the contest. As usual this winning post.

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  17. I so loved it dear Arti! Beautiful words, and you had me from the first words - had to see what this was about:-) You are definitely a winner! All the best of luck! Yey to you!!!

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  18. Arti, Just read your post, you're a winner , Wish you all the best for the contest :) Good Luck ~ da

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  19. Wish you luck ? .... you are a sure winner in this :-)

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  20. All the best Arti! Hope it brings you happiness and satisfaction… apart winning the contest.

    Well written :)

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  21. This was really profound. Best of luck for the contest.

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  22. WOW.. Well written.. I don't think you need luck with this kind of entry.. You will win without's its help any way..! Great going Arti.. Keep it souring..!

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  23. I may sound repeatative, but I must say this is a winning entry. Well thoght, beautifully worded!

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  24. Best wishes for your great entry, Arti! May you get to script your success story!
    Cute illustration & profound words.
    Winning is all this & more. May we all be winners for life! :)

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  25. Well done, Arti! This was a great read and very inspiration. Wishing you the best of luck!

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  26. Sir Winston's Churchill said..."success is failure after failure but never waning in enthusiasm"..a beautiful post..

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  27. Very nice post Arti ! You have defined winning very well !

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  28. Your posts always make me stop for a while during my busy days and think of my life. Your writing is so inspiring and I also wish you luck Arti! As everyone here, I love your thoughts!

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  29. Ones creative work must satisfy a persons in soul that you know in your heart something has spoken through you. You are so right Arti it is not medals or rewards, it is what you feel about your work and what it brings you. You are even more blessed when your work touches the hearts of those who read or see it as yours have touch the hearts of many. May your writing spread far and wide to touch the hearts of many. Good luck...

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  30. WOW... Your post is a WINNER already :)

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  31. You never fail to get my attention from your first written word to the last.... I am your fan and will always be... thank you for inspiring many of us to be winners at heart: )

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